Ebb and Flow

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My name is Dan Godley and I was unexpectedly diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer on November 8th 2021, at the age of 28. Pancreatic Cancer is a very aggressive form of cancer and one that is rarely found in people my age. Although this blog was created as a response to the diagnosis, the aim of it is far-reaching: to document my experience of cancer, provide a space of catharsis for the many thoughts throughout the journey and beyond, and to help others find positivity and meaning in life that only became possible to me once I was facing this situation.


The blog is named after a little-known song by a little-known band called Homebound, which broke up a few years ago. The chorus of this song always stood out to me and does so now more than ever. If anything I write can have a similar impact on someone else, then I consider it a huge success.

Life never gets easier at all

Just a little more heavy and harder to control

The highs and lows they come and go,

So do what’s best for you and know

We were a drop in the sea,

Part of the ebb and flow

Much Love, Dan


Latest Posts

Blog

Scan Day

The Road to Recovery The day has come again…. attending the CT scan at the end of phase one of treatment. My last scan was at the half way point after 6 chemotherapy sessions, at the end of February, and produced good results. My tumour had shrunk from 3.2cm to 2.1cm, my tumour markers had…

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Completing Chemotherapy…

The Chemotherapy Diaries It is good to have a project. Better when that project is something of your choosing, but a project is a project. This blog started off as a project and it has taken some significant steps to get it going. They weren’t significant meaning it was a very tough and arduous process,…

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Waiting, Waiting…

The Road to Recovery Sometimes I wonder if purgatory is a real place. I sit and ponder over what it could be. Perhaps it’s a play area, but all of the slides are covered in hot tar that never cools down. Maybe it’s your favourite clothing store, but you don’t have any money to purchase…

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Losing Hair

The Chemotherapy Diaries It feels like I haven’t written a lot for this series of late. I’m not sure why because I can’t see an obvious drop in momentum looking at the post dates. Perhaps it reflects the feeling that I have about me posting less on the blog generally, which I know to be…

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Whitby

The ‘C’ Word English people are quite bad at recognising that their country of origin is very beautiful. I know this because I am an English person and I frequently undervalue the appeal of my homeland. When it comes to holidays, we usually favour taking advantage of cheap flights into Europe to get better guarantees…

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Blog Series

The Road to…

Documenting how I was diagnosed and how recovery is going

The Chemotherapy Diaries

My journey through chemotherapy

The ‘C’ Word Challenge

Blog posts avoiding the ‘C’ word

Reflections

Reflections on a variety of topics



Poetry

Perfection

Striving for perfectionA feat that I concedeMay lead to an imperfectionOf my personalityCritiquing all the writingEnsuring it is freeFrom grammatical delusionNo need for subtletyProposition and a verbThe subject here is meThese rules are non-negotiableWho has deceiv’d thee?And please call me a pedantA badge I wear with gleeThere’s no shades to this greyI’m apathetic to your…

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Alive

The boundaries are blurred so I wait Observing from a distance, I consider my fate In time there’s some meaning I establish my feelings A calming naivety, au fait As I recoil back within Escape the prison of my skin I know that I suffer, but I’m alive There’s moments of fear And flashes of…

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3:00am

All I have is time I had it before, but now it stares at me. The morning waves, the evening scowls My watch holds my wrist Patiently My head falls through the pillow It screams and pulls my eyes open And my watch is waiting, staring: 3:00am Discussion I wrote 3:00am in the first week…

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Positivity Playlist

A collaborative playlist for positive vibes only!