Ebb and Flow

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My name is Dan Godley and I was unexpectedly diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer on November 8th 2021, at the age of 28. Pancreatic Cancer is a very aggressive form of cancer and one that is rarely found in people my age. Although this blog was created as a response to the diagnosis, the aim of it is far-reaching: to document my experience of cancer, provide a space of catharsis for the many thoughts throughout the journey and beyond, and to help others find positivity and meaning in life that only became possible to me once I was facing this situation.


The blog is named after a little-known song by a little-known band called Homebound, which broke up a few years ago. The chorus of this song always stood out to me and does so now more than ever. If anything I write can have a similar impact on someone else, then I consider it a huge success.

Life never gets easier at all

Just a little more heavy and harder to control

The highs and lows they come and go,

So do what’s best for you and know

We were a drop in the sea,

Part of the ebb and flow

Much Love, Dan


Latest Posts

Blog

November 8th, 2021

The Road to Recovery It feels like a lot has happened since I last posted. I’ve been abroad for the first time since before the pandemic, I’ve completed the first cycle of chemotherapy and have now started cycle 2. I also marked the 1 year anniversary of my cancer diagnosis on November 8th – a…

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Chemotherapy Returns: A Tale of Tiredness & Ulcers

The Chemotherapy Diaries Back in the chemotherapy fog… As I lay on the sofa a few nights ago, the TV show I was watching ended. After a few minutes of adverts, a sound I dreaded came on… The news was beginning. I couldn’t see the remote around me, and I was feeling worn out from…

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The Last Throes of Treatment

From now on, I think October will always be a weird time for me. It is that period when the days start getting shorter, and all of the enthusiasm of the summer sun is waning. I didn’t use to mind the shorter days; winter was actually my favourite time of year when I was younger.…

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Marathoner

My slight insomnia seems more determined than ever right now, so I find myself starting writing this post at 00:30 on Monday morning. I spent Sunday attempting to support my eldest sister Becky as she ran the London marathon. My ‘attempt’ to support her wasn’t because I was not indeed supporting her through my thoughts…

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Sonder

‘The profound feeling of realizing that everyone, including strangers passing in the street, has a life as complex as one’s own, which they are constantly living despite one’s personal lack of awareness of it.’ Wikipedia, Definition of ‘Sonder’ I’m sure the title of this blog post will be met with glee by some of my…

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Blog Series

The Road to…

Documenting how I was diagnosed and how recovery is going

The Chemotherapy Diaries

My journey through chemotherapy

The ‘C’ Word Challenge

Blog posts avoiding the ‘C’ word

Reflections

Reflections on a variety of topics



Poetry

Perfection

Striving for perfectionA feat that I concedeMay lead to an imperfectionOf my personalityCritiquing all the writingEnsuring it is freeFrom grammatical delusionNo need for subtletyProposition and a verbThe subject here is meThese rules are non-negotiableWho has deceiv’d thee?And please call me a pedantA badge I wear with gleeThere’s no shades to this greyI’m apathetic to your…

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Alive

The boundaries are blurred so I wait Observing from a distance, I consider my fate In time there’s some meaning I establish my feelings A calming naivety, au fait As I recoil back within Escape the prison of my skin I know that I suffer, but I’m alive There’s moments of fear And flashes of…

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3:00am

All I have is time I had it before, but now it stares at me. The morning waves, the evening scowls My watch holds my wrist Patiently My head falls through the pillow It screams and pulls my eyes open And my watch is waiting, staring: 3:00am Discussion I wrote 3:00am in the first week…

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Positivity Playlist

A collaborative playlist for positive vibes only!